The Art of Becoming

To become. To fully embrace oneself. To change or to grow to be.

Whether we appreciate the shifts or not, we are constantly evolving into something new. Our experiences, our interactions and our personal revelations color the way we view and engage with the world. Daily, we become updated versions of ourselves, and the happenings that we experience now serve as our reference point for tomorrow.

When situations seem stagnant, it is hard to believe that we are becoming something new. Yet at the most elementary level, we are at least a little older, perhaps a little wiser and often a little less nimble.

Wherever you stand on the idea of destiny, it is clearly the simplest explanation for the unexplainable. Often, believing that we are somewhat part of a greater plan can help us swallow our life experiences easier. It takes the cruelty away from our casualties and gives meaning to the insignificant.

Until recently, I have never been so desperate to believe that everything happens on purpose. Tragedy has a habit of doing that to you. It is hard to find reasoning in your loss, so you have to hope that it is part of your “becoming”.

Despite it seeming like a cop out, hindsight is always 20/20. I often look back at the “missed” opportunities and failures, thanking God that they didn’t manifest into something more. The job you didn’t get, the relationship that failed, the school that didn’t accept you – it is all part of the process of becoming. It is challenging to appreciate this in the moment, but as time progresses, it is easier to see the reasons why.

Perhaps you’re in a position where you don’t understand why circumstances are unfolding the way they are? Or, you know there’s more to life than what you’re experiencing, but things feel so stagnant at the moment? Maybe tragedy has struck your home and you’re wondering how you’ll ever recover?

 Here lies the hope - if you are still breathing, you are still becoming, and there is still purpose in you being here.

To me, purpose is more than finding your overall calling, your groove or what you’ve been made for. Purpose is discovering what you have been called to do today, and trusting it is part of your becoming. You may be struggling with your circumstance, but how will you survive today? There may be destruction all around you, but how will you create today? You may have a burden to help the masses, but how will you help one person today? Purpose begins today.

Too often we fail to see the divine in the daily. We’re so busy looking for our “a-ha moment” we don’t appreciate the small “oohs”. The workplaces we go to, the conversations we have, the children we raise – the “oohs” – they are part of purpose too. They are part of your becoming.

The ability to reflect is an undervalued privilege. Some of us have to spend so much time being and doing, that we don’t have the opportunity to reflect on who we are becoming. Yet knowing who we are becoming helps us to be and do better. So if you have the opportunity, consider these with me:

·      Take at least five minutes to contemplate what happened in your day  – whether in the evening or the morning after. Think of the things you were grateful for, the things that were challenging, and the things you would like to change. This will allow you to appreciate how you are becoming daily.

·      Feed your soul. For me, it is through scripture, podcasts and sermons. If you don’t have something positive deposited within you, it will be difficult to give something positive back. This spills over into your work and your relationships, so be mindful on how you feed yourself.

·      Recognize what tugs on your heart. What is your burden? Whose life do you want to change today? It may be youth, women, single parents, entrepreneurs, etc. It is uncanny how focusing on people outside of yourself will show you who you are truly becoming,

·      Surround yourself with people who want to see you grow. Although every relationship shapes you in some regard, be aware of people who are trying to stifle your growth or progress.

·      Be patient with the process. This is difficult, but I’ve been reminded of the faith we must have in seeds. Seeds are buried the ground, in the hope that they will become something fruitful. It is surrounded by darkness, and often forgotten about. Yet if you are diligent. If you keep watering the ground and giving it light, a shoot will surely appear. That small seed, the seemingly insignificant, will become something beautiful. We have to trust that in the same way, we too will see the fruit of our becoming.